News Roundup 1.27.10

Scary, drunk, hate-mongering lunatic takes time off from being arrested to attempt a Hollywood comeback.  It doesn’t quite seem to be taking.  [Backstage]

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A neighborhood association in Berkeley has filed a class action suit against U.C. Berkeley’s frats on a theory that apparently “has its roots in cities’ injunctions against criminal street gangs.”  Because if there’s one thing that comes to mind when you think of criminal street gangs, it’s a bunch of drunk, overprivileged white nerds who couldn’t get into Stanford projectile vomiting over the balcony of a converted Victorian row house.  [Above the Law]

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Yet another group of law students rallies to bring the cast of Jersey Shore into their open arms.  Confusion ensues.  [Above the Law]

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In related news, Jersey Shore’s Vinny Guadagnino, the one that you’ve never heard of, revealed that he recently took the LSATs and is keeping law school “on the back burner,”  but admitted ”to tell you the truth, man, [being a] lawyer isn’t something I wanted to do. Nobody wants to be a lawyer — it’s hard work.”  Well, apparently no one told him that…that… Nope, sorry.  He’s right. [Perez Hilton]

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Keifer Sutherland falls for the old “Give Me a Million Dollars for Some Mexican Cows” scam.  [Huff Post]

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‘:-/   [ABA Journal]

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The Los Angeles City Council has approved an ordinance intended to close hundreds of “medical marijuana” shops and banish those that remain to industrial areas.  Sorry.  [AP via Washington Post]

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After Andy Dick’s arrest this past weekend on two felony sex abuse counts for crotch-grabbing a bouncer and kissing a male patron at a West Virginia bar, word’s hitting the street that it’s not the first time ol’ Andy’s been grab-happy on the record.  The latest story involves licking, groping and biting—with a few “coke whore” slurs thrown in for good measure.  And there’s audio!  [NY Post]

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News Roundup 1.15.10

NBC executron Dick Ebersol took time earlier today to fuel the latest Jay vs. Conan fire, calling out his network’s own Conan O’Brien for being a “chicken-hearted,” “gutless” failure.  On an unrelated note, highlights from NBC’s recent remake of Knight Rider are available for download here.  [NY Times]

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Recent reports have confirmed: When you submit that unsolicited manuscript to the nearest publisher/ agent/ fame-making media machine, the terrorists win.  Don’t say we didn’t warn you.  [WSJ Online]

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How do you spell “excitement” if you’re a futures trader in Chicago?  Nose-biting and fist fights, apparently.  As if you didn’t already know that.  [Dealbreaker]

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You thought the waves of major law firm layoffs were over.  You were wrong.  [ABA Journal]

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In a related story, early reports suggest that, despite the global economic reign of fire that burned through Big Law over the past year, profits per partner remained  strong in 2009.  See?  All those associate layoffs had a silver lining, didn’t they, kids?  No?  [Above the Law]

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Still haven’t locked down a new job?   Wondering what it might be like to work in a mansion…naked?  Well, polish up your boobs resume, kids, because Hef’s apparently taking applications.  [Huff Post]

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Speaking of job hunting, it looks like the top spot in Apple’s legal department just flew open.  After just 18 months lawyering at the altar of all things tech sexy, the company’s general counsel, Charles Charnas, has officially left.  No word yet on where he’s heading—or who’s taking over the top spot.   [Law.com]

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Just when you were thinking Times Square would be that much better if only it were filled with a rotating 30-foot-tall display of headshots of the FBI’s most wanted fugitives, your wish comes true.  You’re welcome.  [Gawker]